big sword alert – and not in a good way

[erastes]

good lord. If you are going to make love under or on an anachronistic blanket in anachronistic clothes then for god’s sake don’t bring your NAKED SWORD and put it next to your loved one!! Unless you want her to be mince in five minutes time. 

Comments

[beckyblack]

I'm sure I've seen that cover art before. :D

Yeah she should be saying "You're getting nothing till you put the sword under the bed, luv."

Reminds me of the movie Excaliber which includes shagging while wearing plate armour. Doesn't exactly convince me.

[erastes.livejournal.com]

*giggles* REALLY? Plate armour?

[beckyblack]

I know. Did the makers of the movie think that knights took their metal pants off if they had to "go" while in armour? Not to mention the whole weight issue. "Get off! You're crushing me!"

[tiggothy.livejournal.com]

You haven't seen it? It's classic!

[vashtan.livejournal.com]

Never mind the anachronistic SWORD.

The cover artist needs a good flogging.

[erastes.livejournal.com]

i guessed it must be, but wasn't qualified to say!

[mylodon.livejournal.com]

He has anachronistic muscles, too.

[erastes.livejournal.com]

He probably has ye olde gymmme

[alex-beecroft.livejournal.com]

I'm trying to remember something I read somewhere once about "a knight bedding his master's bride by proxy, with a naked sword between them," but it carries on eluding me. Either way I'm sure this was not what they meant!

[erastes.livejournal.com]

Yes - I remember reading that - seems a bit daft if you ask me - better to have a chaperone with them or put them in different rooms.

[antychan.livejournal.com]

This reminds me that the German word for sheath and vagina is one and the same ("Scheide").

Grandmother, reading from "The Last Unicorn": "He put his sword in the sheath."
Mini!Anty: "EW!!"

[erastes.livejournal.com]

Warning: gay fiction my permanently disturb your writing pleasure

[essayel.livejournal.com]

The perspective's all wrong for it to be laying on the coverlet - which is undisturbed by the weight of it, look at the lines of the folds - so maybe he's stabbed it through her foot to pin her to the mattress and she's saying, "I knew there was a reason we hate the English".

I will defend that unlikely suggestion in any court in the land as being no more outlandish than other things I have read in historical romances.

[erastes.livejournal.com]

*snort* yes you are probably right about the coverlet, it's probably just THERE to show it's a sword saga because you can't guess the era by the cover (or the sword in fact...)

[countrygirlxxoo.livejournal.com]

Well, I'm sure it's all right for him to bring his naked sword and put it next to (into) his loved one...just not the METAL one!

[erastes.livejournal.com]

Nod nod - would have made a better cover too. :)

[themostepotente.livejournal.com]

I'm too busy laughing at the stupid title :P

[erastes.livejournal.com]

that's Het Romance for you...

[lee-rowan.livejournal.com]

No, no... It's HER sword and she's not letting him near it.

[erastes.livejournal.com]

Good point, she has her other hand free. Any minute now she's going to grab it and stab him through his anachronistic trousers.

[lee-rowan.livejournal.com]

I was thinking more along the lines of thunking him in the chin with the hilt, but that idea has merit, too...