There, for a while, in your smile

[erastes]

Firstly. For an absent minded writer who writes from home AND work
and various other places....

www.writely.com You can upload docs and edit them, you can invite
others to edit too! and you don't run the risk of leaving your files
at work!! (or having your gay porn read by anyone....)

A Boon!!

I've been humming "Mr Raffles - Man it
was Mean" all day (Cockney Rebel) I will have to go and buy all his
back catalogue. Why I didn't buy them when I was younger I really
don't know. Bloody hell what a brilliant song that was. I highly
recommend trying to get hold of a copy if you don't have it, if you
like early Bowie, Iggy Pop, that sort of thing, Cockney Rebel were a
brief flash of genius. Favourites of theirs: Judy Teen, Sebastian.
('that's if you are my age, of course, not if you are into the thump
thump thump of a generation below me) harumph. kids today mutter
mutter. It didn't hurt that Steve Harley was a God in the 1970's
either.

But does anyone know what Mr Raffles was about? Or was it just about a
mythical assassin? When I was a kid I thought it was about Jesus, but
that's because they cut out the entire stanza about slaughtering
babies) I'm mildly dissapointed as it fits beautifully for Jesus.

No-one will know this of course. No-one's as ancient as me.,

After the euphoria of
yesterday's sale, the irony of fiction brings me back down to earth
and I get a rejection from Clarkesworld for my poor executioner, Ox.
It was a very nice rejection, as the editor is well known in the biz
for being caustic/honest if he thinks you suck. He said he enjoyed
the story but it fell down on two points (both of which I agree with)

1. that the character was surprisingly eloquent in spite of his lowly
upbringing and being shunned by his society. Now I really don't know
how to get around this - I discussed this story a while back on my LJ
and didn't reach a conclusion even then. It's a first person piece
and I can't write:

"Me Ox. Me Dim. Me executioner. Me like to kill. Mmmmmm Killing."

And if I gave a REASON why he's so eloquent in his thoughts (perhaps
had a monk as a friend when he was a kid) then it negates the tragedy
of his youth completely and makes him a different person. I suppose
you either get him, or you don't. But I'm failing somewhere along the
line. If anyone would like to be kind enough to cast a jaundiced eye
over the piece, I'd be very grateful.

2. that it didn't have any speculative/fantasy/magical element, which
was completely true, it could have been historical fiction, so I'll
have to either add a speculative element or bring in dragons being
kept in the cellars or something. Perhaps he was keeper of Chimeras or
summat. He also said it wasn't horrific, which I can't agree with
(although he's probably innured to horror) as my mother read it and
thought it was nightmare inducing!!! *G*

But he didn't slag the writing off, so that's a bonus!!!!!,

Comments

[mroctober.livejournal.com]

Nick's tough but fair. I agree he is intimidating (which is why I can't bring myself to submit). Bully for you for the attempt, though.

[rwday.livejournal.com]

You should give it a try. I got a very encouraging rejection that gave me concrete suggestions for making my story stronger. Much better than the standard 'thanks but no thanks.' I will definitely submit to Clarkesworld again.

[mroctober.livejournal.com]

I honestly do not think he would like my style.

[rwday.livejournal.com]

Ah, that makes sense. I thought from the comment that your hesitation was due to worry over Nick's style of rejection. I've got a couple of publications I generally avoid submitting to because the editorial taste doesn't really match mine most of the time, so I understand where you're coming from.

[mroctober.livejournal.com]

Well, lol, I also fear his publicly ridiculing my work, as well.

[lyras.livejournal.com]

Writely does look great - I've just signed up - but on reading their faq, it seems there are plans to introduce a paid version at some point, for tasks like creating PDFs. I hope this doesn't mean that any free version ends up full of ads!

I have no advice to offer on re Ox, I'm afraid. The only thing I can think of, and I don't suppose it's possible, is - would it be possible to put the story in the third person instead of the first?

[erastes.livejournal.com]

I don't use PDF's so I don't mind that, but I can do without ads. Eeek!

I've tried 3rd person, that doesn't work, I need to get right deep inside his head... Oh well, I'll keep trying.

[rosie-red73.livejournal.com]

That's too bad about Ox, I really liked that one. I have to say though, I really didn't find him eloquent because I remember you worrying about that at the time. He seemed more insightful to me rather than eloquent, like he was uneducated but not stupid, which worked in my opinion. But what do I know? :D

[erastes.livejournal.com]

which proves to me that you GOT him.

Well, hopefully someone else will eventually.

[bloodrebel333.livejournal.com]

*hasn't read Ox*